Humbling

On the first Sunday of December...I know that sounds like a Christmas Carol starting, but it isn't, unless you're the Grinch. I went to church, Iron Faith Fellowship, and parked in a usual spot, up at the far back of the lot near the entry-exit ramp. We have a parking lot greeter named Paul and when he saw where I parked  he asked why.

"Why don't I park closer to the door. There are handicap spaces right here."

I explained I parked where I did because there might be others more needful of those spaces than I. After all, I can still walk with my walking stick.

Anyway, I always back into the parking space, which has a slight slope downward. When I got out I saw a little stream of water flow down in front, like you see on hot summer days after running the AC. Only this was not a hot summer day and I had the heater on. It bothered me, but the car had been wet from an overnight shower so I considered it run off.

After church I drove to the Philly Pretzel Factory where I always buy my Sunday pretzels. As I pulled

away from a light I saw a puddle where my car had idle and then on the way home my overheat light lit red.

I made it home, a short distance fortunately, for I had lost all my coolant. I wondered if my wife's recent accident (she hit a building) had damaged the circultory system or if the water pump or raditor had gone kaput. If this was serious I didn't know what to do. We had no money for a major repair and certainly not enough to buy a new vehicle. This is because like my radiator was drained, so had been my bank account from all the medical bills over the last two years.

It was a troubling situation if the car was out of commission. You need a vehicle where we live.

But I know God will meet your needs. And people came quickly to my aid. One of the church members, Bill. came over the next evening and to look at the car. Turnd out the lower radiator hose was completely disconnected. It was not a major repair. The hose had to be worked back on the radiator outlet and then the pinch clamp moved up over both to hold it in place.

Another church member, Sharon, showed up with a meal of baked ziti. Some of the women had started bring meals to us while my wife was laid up after having her knee replaced last week. Sharon said she was a mechanic and went out to help Bill. Putting the hose and clamp back on was more difficult than it sounds.

Here is the humbling part. Just a few years ago I could have done this all myself. Now because of the ALS I can't kneel down to look under the car. I would have a difficult time getting up again.  Even if I could do that, even if I could have seen below that the hose was off, I couldn't fix it anymore like once I could. Bill had to jack the front end up a bit in order to wiggle under and put on the hose and then use a pair of pliers to work back the clamp. My hands no longer have the strength to pinch the clamp open, let alone work it over the hose and outlet. Like many other things I once could do, I have to let someone else do now.

With my wife now temporaily  incapacitated due to a knee replacement, I have to do much more. I am grateful those ladies brought us meals this last week because, though I can cook, it has become very difficult to do so. Cooking a simple meal leaves we exhausted and the weakness now of my hands, the Doctors said, these were my weakest muscles, I can barely cut things, plus I constantly drop objects or make spills.

It is okay to be humbled. There are a lot of pople who should experience some humple pie, especially among politicians.  It is just frustrating.

This past Monday, my wife experienced a sudden and strange allegic reaction. Her lips expanded

until they looked like one of those plasic surgery gone wrong promos. We kidded her that big lips were in fashion, but she didn't find that so funny. Her entire face was actual swollen and later she developed hives.Fortunately, the Physical Therapists came that day and called the doctor. It was a somewhat dangerous situation. If she started having breathing difficulties it would have been a call to 911 and into the hospital.

We saw the Doctor early that afternoon. He couldn't identify the reason, but suspected it might be her high pressure medication. He

prescribed Presidone, a new High Blood Pressure midication to replace her old one and a couple other things. He wanted her to begin taking these medications right away.

I am happy to say this worked and after a week her face was back to normal and the hives were gone.


I have to admit I've noticed more progression with this disease I have. I'm having just a grand old time trying to do things with my hands. I have had to cut back on my morning walks. I still try to get out every sunrise, but my distance has shrunk. I can feel my legs pleading for mercy much sooner.  Fatigue sneaks over me sooner these days as well. I get the mid-day droops for certain. It isn't a sleepy tireless, just an overall lethargic feeling. For instance, my mind wants me to turn over and my body says, Make me, and won't move.

Speaking of fatigue, just keying this post wore me out, as ridiculous as that sounds.

Since my wife's knee operation I've had to do more despite the fatigue or the weaknesses. I've had to cook more often and I find cooking totally wipes me out. This is all, as I titled this, humbling and frustrating.  Yes, it is all humbling, but also embracing to see the many blessing I have received from God through other people. It's a wonderful life after all.

By the way, it was December 1, 2016 when the doctors told me I had ALS. The first serious signs had appeared a half year earlier. I think one oddity is I don't think I look as seriously ill as I am, at least not yet. But I do depend on that walking stick even if I still look pretty strong.