What They Must Think of Me

As I reported recently, I was to a three hour clinic the other week, like an interesting specimen at your local zoo. I wonder what they saw looking at me, because I got the report and am not sure this is the same guy I see in the mirror. Do I really need all this stuff all ready?

Stuff, what stuff?

Apparently there may be a lot of stuff you may eventually get in your stocking, so you might need a pretty big stocking.

I didn't get much of an explanation of the results; listed under the grouping: Vitals,  just more of a list of the stuff they want me to have.

Let's start with the first stat and it was disturbing to me. My weight, which was 178.5 pounds. A couple years ago my weight was in the 180s someplace and I wasn't happy about it, even though people continually referred to me as trim or thin or sometimes skinny. I didn't feel that skinny, too much belly fat. The photo at the beginning is me by some rocks as I took my early morning walk of 5 or more miles, I took these walks every morning for years. This one was in 2014 and I did weigh over 180 pounds.

In 2015 I spent the year doing not only my usual morning walks, but also regular exercise routine as well as cutting back on sugar and eating more fruit and vegetables. I was doing these exercise stations along a track in a state park, using a rowing machine at hime and going to the senior center gym three times a week.

By the end of 2015 I had achieved my goals. Most of my belly fat was gone, my weight was at 165 pounds, I was physically strong, felt good and was getting very good doctor visit exams. And so it went until that fateful late A when during my usual morning walk my legs went weird and I found myself 6 months later being told I had ALS. Thus we return to my clinic results and my unhappy gain of weight. However, the doctors aren't unhappy with those pounds. They want me to gain a few more and to keep a weekly record on the scales; just don't lose weight!

Being told by your doctor to gain weight can have its advantage.  I'm eating candy and having milk shakes again.

The second, and oddly last, statistic under vitals probably should have disturbed me more, except I don't know enough yet to read these things on first blush. We are very thankful for Google. This was Forced Vital Capacity: Erect 47%  Supine 61%. Capacity of what and what do the percentages mean?  I hadn't a clue.

The Vitals were followed by directions.

FEEDING: (Boy that does sound like a specimen in a zoo. It is feeding time, watch the trainer feet the seals):  I was to continue with my current diet, which to them seemed suspect. I generally have a bowl of cereal in the morning (although sometimes I pop some popcorn instead) with a couple cups of coffee and occasional a sticky bun. Lunch is anything that strikes my fancy to grab these days. I don't follow any formal three meals a day. I might make a sandwich or I might just eat some potato chips or I might have nothing at all, except a glass of V-8 and/or Orange Juice. My big meal will be dinner, generally in a restaurant three times a week. It is usually typical, I guess, a protein, a starch, a salad, a side. Oh, Sundays I have a donut at church and then soft Philly pretzels as my midday meal.

They recommended Ensure Plus as a meal or snack. I prefer my milk shakes from ARBY's but we'll see.

GENERAL:

Utilize built up handles for utensils and handwriting tools.  This consists so far of a foam rubber tube with a hole down the middle. You stick your fork or spoon in the hole and it gives you more control. Or you stick a pen or pencil in the hole to aid in writing. I haven't really utilized this yet. I am clumsy now and drop things like a fork, but I still manipulate them pretty well if I hold on to them. Where I really fail these days is cutting, but none of our knives fit the hole. I need some kind of cutting aid, which does exist, I just don't have any. My handwriting has always been bad and it is getting worse, but its more a degree of unreadability. To tell the truth, my keying is weakening as well.

I was given three exercises to do, all involve stretching to maintain a flexibility. They aren't difficult; just boring.

There is also an odd looking gadget I am to breath through twice a day for 15 minutes each time. I wear a nose clip to force my breathing through the mouth. This supposedly strengthens the muscles that aid in breathing. The nose clamp tends toward hurting after a bit.

A prescription was ordered for Levsin to help with drooling. I had them cancel this. I have not reached a drooling stage yet, thank goodness. I read that tomato juice and sucking olives relieves drooling. I like tomato juice and olives. I wonder if V-8 would do the trick, I already drink a good bit of that and it must contain a lot of tomato juice.

They also suggested tonic water with quinine for cramps, one glass a day. I am not having cramps.

They want me to wear a right toe off brace to improve foot clearance. I go to get fitted with this next Monday, but I really haven't been tripping. I hope it isn't a drag.

Finally, BREATHING, which I am still managing to do. They have seen I was supplied with a
Trilogy Respirator with full face mask. I appear like I'm flying high altitude jets or something. It is a strange sensation as this thing pumps air into me. I am supposed to sleep wearing it, but for the most part sleep avoids me when I wear. Perhaps it is frightened. I have fallen asleep with it on a couple times, but both times I woke perhaps an hour or so later and had to take it off to fall asleep again. I wear sometimes just watching TV in hope I'll adjust to the weight and discomfort. Again, this is a device to build my muscle power for exhaling.

I didn't expect so much equipment this soon. I get fatigued easily, stumble a bit, but I am still  functioning.